Happy National Candy Day! It’s a real thing, even though it definitely sounds like something I’d make up on the regular. In honor of this great holiday, you’ll get the week off from work and a candy review! (Week off might vary from workplace to workplace.) Now I don’t know if they still have Pumpkin Spice Latte M&Ms in stores, but in case they do, or in case they ever bring them back, I feel obligated to make this PSA – do not ever buy these terrible, terrible M&Ms.
I had to order these special Pumpkin Spice Latte M&Ms from Target, since you can’t buy them in normal stores. Ultimately, I think it was M&M-Mars Incorporated’s subtle way to spare the general population from this offense to candy. Because of the shipping, they got crushed in transit, which was the least bad thing about these M&Ms. Admittedly, I’m not a huge fan of Pumpkin Spice Lattes in general – they are ok, but they’re generally too sweet for me (!? seems impossible, right?). I thought the extra sweetness would not be a problem in a candy, and it wasn’t. The problem was the artificial pumpkin spice aspect, which tasted more like soap or some sort of chemical that is flavored in such a way as to warn you not to eat it.
I hate to waste food, but I felt no pangs of regret upon dumping all the remaining PSL M&Ms into the trash, since these cloying, waxy soap shards were most definitely not food.
I also tried the Mint M&Ms for the first time. I’ve been seeing these at checkout stands for so long I finally caved and tried them. I expected to be as underwhelmed as I was with the birthday cake M&Ms, and I pretty much was. The mint flavor wasn’t bad, but again there was something disturbingly waxy about the candy. That waxiness lingered, too, and successfully prevented me from ever finishing the (small) bag. The candies were also puffier than plain (just like the birthday cake ones), and for no good reason, since they weren’t filled with anything but chocolate (again, just like the birthday cake ones). A definite let-down.
Lest you think I just don’t like M&Ms, let me introduce you to the greatest M&M creation, nay, one of the greatest candy creations in history – the Almond M&M. Perfection in every bite, the candy has no hint of waxiness, the almond is always perfectly crunchy, and you can tell yourself you’re eating healthy because it’s almonds and that’s protein and good fats and junk. (Mostly junk.) The Almond M&M is better than the Peanut M&M (similar but the peanut just isn’t as good, and sometimes the quality control on the peanuts is lacking), better than the Pretzel M&M (good but after several bags it’s hard to keep eating them, and I prefer my candy without limits), and better than the Crispy M&M (although delightful, it doesn’t have the body the Almond does). I won’t discuss the Peanut Butter M&M, as you’ll either love them or hate them or be mildly indifferent to them or be somewhere along that spectrum (I’m between indifferent and hate). ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
How did you celebrate National Candy Day? Do you drink Pumpkin Spice Lattes? What’s your favorite M&M? Share in the comments!